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Having problems getting through to your defiant adolescent about needed behavior changes? A behavioral agreement may be the way to go. Behavioral agreements are contracts between parent and youngster intended to produce desired outcomes. It may be higher grades, doing more chores, developing a better attitude, or making new friends. Regardless, the process to create a behavioral agreement is the same. All moms and dads have a wish list for their kids. College preparation may be on the list. Doing more work around the house, or at least keep their bedroom clean makes most lists. Improved attitudes and more respect for moms and dads and other adult authority figures can be big. Pick the changes and plan an agreement that will lead to what you want. Points to consider before drafting a behavioral agreement: 1. You are unlikely to turn an extremely poor student into the class academic leader with one quick agreement. Pick your battles and put them in writing. Avoid making the ag...

As moms and dads, we want to know that we’re in control. But our children tend to beg, plead, and whine about the options we make for them. So, give your children options (without really letting them choose). This is a great way to let children have an option without giving up all the parental control. But you don’t have to make it an option between something they want and something you want for them, like candy or an orange. Choose the orange for them, but they get to choose how they’re going to eat it… in slices or with cottage cheese. Empowering your children with options gives them more independence. It teaches them the relationship between their decisions and outcomes. And with more practice, their decision making skills will grow into a valuable lifelong lesson. Giving children options encourages cooperation, which is what we are trying to get in the first place. Giving children options helps prevent power struggles. The ability to choose is a natural human need. Quench ...