RAD Child

Mark:

Thank you for the quick email. My wife C___ and I are starting to go through the material now.

One question (I think I know the answer, but figured I would check), I am assuming these strategies have been successful on children with a diagnosis of Reactive Attachment Disorder as well as ODD. Our son C___ is 15 years old and exhibiting most of the issues you describe. He is extremely confrontational and defiant at this time, but not violent. He is insisting upon control of his life than making very poor decisions with that control. C___ was removed from his biological mother at 18 months and his father was already incarcerated by that time for sexually molesting one of C___'s sisters. Ended up, he later admitted to sexually molesting three of C___'s sisters (none were the father's biological children). The six children were all in foster care for a minimum of 7 years prior to being adopted.

We adopted C___ just before his 10th birthday. He had lived with us for approximately 10 months prior to the adoption. While there were always minor behavioral issues, the out of control teenager aspect has completely taken over since last January, providing us with truly 9 months of hell. While never a great student, he has lost ALL interest in school. He does attend, but is disruptive and refuses to do any work. Despite doing decently for the first two 10 week marking periods last year (mid to high 70's, some 80's), he ended up failing both math and english basically for not doing his work. Due to his behavior, the school is very close to filing a PINS (person in need of supervision) application with the courts.

C___ and I will be completing the article over the next two days and we are starting to try to put some of the strategies into play. We are definitely saying our prayers on this one. C___ is a good kid who was dealt a very poor hand early in his life.

R.

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Hi R.,

It seems to me [going on what you’ve told me] that a main issue currently is poor academic performance. Please be sure to read the recommendation for this on the page entitled “Emails From Exasperated Parents” [online version of the eBook].

Mark

Have children evaluated...

Dear Mark,

I think your "my out of control teen" site is extremely rich in content with so many links and avenues for reader participation. The information on camps and schools and the even the links to blogs offers such a variety of help.

That you repeat often the advice to have children evaluated is so important. When my husband's nephew at age 12 began to sleep more and lost interest in after-school activities, a few weeks passed with his parents worrying about depression and what might be happening at school before they thought to take him to the doctor. It was leukemia.

I think missing important medical clues with children will worsen with fewer families able to afford general health care and more destitute families using emergency rooms instead of family physicians.

C.

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