I heard two thuds in the house...

Have recently signed up and have been reading and trying to implement some of your ideas. Today was not a good day at all. My son has a fixation on the xbox system and spending money to enhance his game supply. Today while trying to visit my mother who is in the hospital, and taking my father along, (both in their 80's). L originally said he would go for the visit, now refused to go because he did not get his way of wanting me to spend money on a second TV to enhance his X box lan system to show off to his friends what he has. After I said no, and left to pick up my father, outside, I heard two thuds in the house, I've heard these before and knew that he had just busted either the thermostat or the phone off the wall, it was the phone. He denied doing it on purpose… he said he fell going back to his room, tripping on his pj's.

My brother has been trying to see my side of the story for many years as most of the family on both sides say that we have not raised him right. My brother has now seen the light but I still feel he thinks that we are at fault for his disorder. Diagnosis ADHD, ODD, BIPOLAR AND PDD.

Meds have not helped at all although we keep trying to find something to mellow his anger, we are never right and he IS always right, we know nothing, he knows everything. After this episode and talking with my brother as well as L talking to my brother there was no remorse for his behavior or even any thoughts that I missed seeing my mother at the hospital, L’s thoughts of not getting his way took priority over my mother and father. When we brought this up to him he started to feel bad but the TV came right back up to the forefront of the conversation. This lasted for about two hours.

The family consists of me the father, my wife, daughter 16 and L 19, 20 in November. Daughter is an A student and says to get rid of him. I feel that she as lost so much because we have had to put so much time into his bad behavior, wants and needs. It turns my stomach to take him to the hospital as a 302, but every one says I should not have to put up with this type of behavior any more, and let him go residential.

I have been a staunch advocate for L, knowing there is a good side, but 95% of the time I'm running myself ragged and having to put up with his behavior problems that our family life is going to hell.

I'm going to continue to read but ------

Thoughts from you would be helpful.

L.

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Hi L.,

This sounds like all the other stories I hear. You are not alone. In fact, you would shocked to know just how many other parents are going through the same nightmare.

I think the best advice I can give you today is to simply continue to work the program – one week at a time. According to your invoice, you should be digesting Session #2 this week and preparing to implement Session #2 assignments.

Once you get through the four-week program, please email me again with some specific questions.

Thanks,

Mark

My Out-of-Control Teen

I have hope for the first time in a long time...

Well, D has expressed a desire to go back to his aunt's. He has also done some crying. (That is a good thing) I believe that you can release emotions through anger, and crying. So, he has calmed down some. He is still determined to get back to L's. I explained that he has to finish out his school, and that we have to mend as a family unit. I gave him a small goal of visiting again this weekend. I gave him something to hold onto. I don't want to see him blow his brains out.

I am working on a chore list for all of us. He came upstairs and laid down on my bed and talked to me. I am worried about him struggling with depression. This is not the first time that he has been depressed. Depression also runs in my family, that is why I am calling his pediatrician tomorrow for some direction in that area.

I have hope for the first time in a long time. I have some bumps to deal with along the way, but for the most part, I think we are on the right track.

I know I mentioned military school, but his goal is to become a marine. So, it's not a punishment as it may appear. That is so you can understand where that came from.

Thanks again.

C.

My Out-of-Control Teen

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Today has been a much milder day. That is after we had to insist that he go to school. He was pleasant, we remind him that we love him, and that everything is going to work out. Romans 8:28 We know in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, according to His purpose.

Tonight I am handing out household chore list. Putting the past in the past, and looking toward the future. Thanks again

C.