Kids & Poor Academic Performance

Hi Mark,

I am writing for advice on how to get my 7th grade son to do his best in school. He is very intelligent, yet does not seem to care about his schoolwork. He easily makes it on the honor role, but with effort he could be on the top honors. Recently, I discovered that he got a 40% on a Spanish quiz. I asked if he could retake it and he made up some story. After emailing the teacher I discovered that he did retake it during his detention time (which I knew nothing about) and he received the same grade. So now he is lying about his work and about having detention. He is a constant disruption in class. Though the teacher has moved his seat several times he still turns around and talks w/others. What can I do about this??? In general, he is liking 7th grade more because he moves from class to class every 40 minutes. I know that he is easily distracted and we try to give talk w/him about things he can do to focus. The problem is that he doesn't seem to care! He is very active in sports. He is on the soccer team and is doing well with that. He is also playing on a town baseball team. I wanted to take him off of the baseball team, but my husband thinks that will only make matters worse. The busier he is, the better his behavior is, but how do I get him to focus more on his schoolwork??

Thank you again for all of your time and support.

J.

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Hi J.,

Poor academic performance is addressed in the section of the eBook entitled Read these Emails from Exasperated Parents.

Please look toward the bottom of that page where it reads:

"My 16-year-old son brought home straight F's on his last report card. I grounded him for the entire grading period, but he continues to fail in nearly all subjects. I know he is a bright kid and can do the work when he wants to. What can I do to motivate him?"

Let me know if you need clarification,

Mark

Online Parent Support

It is a difficult time at the moment...

Hi Mark - thanks for 'being there' in cyberspace.

I look forward to improving the home environment and relationships here. It is a difficult time at the moment. I have sought help elsewhere locally, but have been placed in a queue - which doesn't help when thing are 'happening'.

Regards,

S.

Online Parent Support

Teen Doesn't Want To Work

HI Mark - thank you again - your online lessons are very valuable! I feel much more at peace and hope they will make a difference soon. Need your advice.....

Our 16 year old was all gung ho to get a job at the local Y as a lifeguard (he is certified) - he filled out the application, got called for an interview and agreed to go tomorrow at 3pm for the interview - now he is decided he doesn't want to work there - we have tried to find out why - lots of excuses (he knows someone who did that and hated it, the water test will be too hard, the pay will be too low etc) We think he is making a big mistake - we tell him he will have no issues passing the text and he should go thru with it and it will be a great job a couple of days a week to get extra gas money. He's says he is going to call and cancel the interview - he claims he will look for another job later..........we don't want to get in a fight and have tried to talk to him calmly about it - I think he just afraid he won't do well or something..........what to do?

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I would say this one falls into the "pick-your-battles-carefully" category. You're right in not wanting to fight about this. I presume you have bigger fish to fry (or will).

He's not going to tell you what's up ...and the more you pry, the more he will make up his mind to not follow through with this job.

Sometimes less is better. That is true in this case. Let go of YOUR NEED to have him be a lifeguard. He'll do well in whatever he sets HIS mind to.

Mark

Online Parent Support