Education and Counseling for Individuals Affected by Oppositional Defiant Disorder and ADHD

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I don’t feel it is fair for us to pay that kind of money...

Hi Mark,

It is the 2nd week of school and my kid already has missing assignments and has a D- and an F in two of her classes. I am not saying anything about it. She is doing her chores and her attitude is okay. My problem is this….she has made the freshmen volleyball team. It will cost me $250 for her to continue to play. I feel it is really important for her to play, it keeps her busy. She obviously is going to get kicked off of the team for her bad grades; she needs to maintain a 2.0 to play. I had told her previously (before I read your book) that if she doesn’t play she could lose any or all privileges. I don’t feel it is fair for us to pay that kind of money for her to play for a couple more weeks and for her not to have any consequences. Do you have any suggestions for me?




Hi W.,

A kid can earn privileges at home as well as school. Sports are school privileges that are earned by maintaining a minimum grade point average. It looks like your daughter may soon be on the receiving end of a “natural consequence” for poor academic performance (i.e., getting kicked off the team).

Should you cough up $250.00? Check with the coach first to see whether or not she is likely to be kicked off the team. If the coach says “yes” …then that’s pretty much the end of it. You shouldn’t throw your money away in that event.


My Out-of-Control Teen

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The Strong-Willed Out-of-Control Teen

The standard disciplinary techniques that are recommended for “typical” teenagers do not take into account the many issues facing teens with serious behavioral problems. Disrespect, anger, violent rages, self-injury, running away from home, school failure, hanging-out with the wrong crowd, drug abuse, theft, and legal problems are just some of the behaviors that parents of defiant teens will have to learn to control.

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