HELP FOR PARENTS WITH STRONG-WILLED, OUT-OF-CONTROL CHILDREN AND ADOLESCENTS

Education and Counseling for Individuals Affected by Oppositional Defiant Disorder and ADHD

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I am truly concerned about her & the Wicca stuff...

Hi Mark

First off I would like to explain a little about the home life...I am a single mom. We are living with my mom, to help her out as she has Parkinson's. I am suffering from nerve damage in my neck & am having lots of issues with pain...& being a mom right now is challenging without having a difficult child.

We live in a small town, my daughter A__ (15), was being seen by the only child psychologist around here... it didn't work out. The psych was trying to turn A___ into a V___ & A___ wouldn't open up to her, instead the counselor would answer questions for her. So we are w/o counseling except for the school psych who sees her once a week.

Anyways, I am on some pretty heavy pain medicine, which is not making any of this easier. I am trying my hardest.

My concern is this....last night I had a really bad night & had to leave my 18 year old up & in charge...I had to go to bed. When I got up this morning, we had found that A___ had been looking up Wicca & Wicca chat groups online. How should I address this with her, without it turning into a major battle??? I am really concerned about this one.

With the condition I am in physically, I have thought about sending her away to a behavioral camp, but finances are rough & I cannot afford it.

We have finally overcome school refusals, after one morning, I got fed up with her refusing to get out of bed to go to school, I banged pots & pans & squirted her with a squirt gun until she got up. She hasn't refused school since.

We had a situation where her brother's Ipod came up missing....we knew she took it, she has a tendency to steal from family. The school counselors told us not to blame her, as we didnt have proof & we didn't want to lose HER trust. What about OUR trust?? A week later, A___ was in her brother's room & said there's something shiney under his bed, I think it's the Ipod. So the Ipod mysteriously reappeared. The whole house was searched...it wasn't there before.

I am truly concerned about her & the Wicca stuff though. I don't even know how to approach her on this. I am not up to a fight.

I have just started going through your program....it's gonna take me a couple times of going over it though as I am on some pretty heavy pain medicine right now.

I just really need some advice on how to approach her on this as I don't want it to be a battle.

Thank you kindly,

T.

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Hi T.,

You’re new to the program. The best advice I can give you at this point is to be patient. Only do one session per week - and only implement one set of assignments per week. In the meantime, just do what you have been doing until you come to parts of the eBook that instruct you otherwise. In session #3, you will discover exactly how to address the issue you listed above.

Having said that, you can get parental control software to stop your daughter from going to places on the net that you do not want her to visit. Here’s the one we use at our house:

PC-Tattletale

1 comment:

Mama Kelly said...

Hello, I stumbled in via google's blosearch feature.

My own advice (as a Wiccan for the past 20 years) would be for the mother to read a little about Wicca and to then sit down and calmly ask her daughter about her interest in the subject.

While she has every right to control what goes on under her own roof, she cannot control what goes on in her child's mind and heart and open communication has to be a better solution that creating an environment where she will feel forced to go behind her mother's back to go to a website.

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