I was just wondering if you could answer a few questions for me. My boyfriend is 19 years old and has oppositional defiant disorder and its driving me crazy. It seems like all we do is fight then he appologizes when he finally makes me cry. How can I make a simple convo not turn into an argument about nothing. For example I was waiting for him to finish getting dresses kinda watching him and he freaked out saying how he HATES when i watch him all the time it annoys him. What?! or another is we were talking about actors and I said that i didnt like a certain actor because he was too popular and he said that it wasnt a good enough reason and got really mad and the fight escalated to him calling me a bitch and me crying. I just cant help but "stick up for myself" but is this just fueling the fire? what are some techniques for dealing with this without feeling like im giving in or just agreeing with him all the time. I feel worthless and resentful alot but i also feel guilty for making him feel like he is a mean person all the time. He refuses to see anyone for help because he was pumped full of meds for adhd when he was just 5 and it really messed him up so is there anything i can do? please help. ive looked everywhere on the internet but i just cant find anything about dealing with a spouse or boyfriend with ODD. thank you for your time and i eagerly look forward to your relpy.
At the risk of turning this email into a sales pitch, I have to say you would greatly benefit from my eBook. I regularly recommend to parents that, in the case where one spouse acts more like a child and less like an adult, the more mature parent simply use the same strategies - except on the other parent.
You'll find a lot of ways to deal with your boyfriend. Just use the strategies in the same way you would with a child, because your boyfriend may be 19-years-old chronologically - but emotionally he's more like a 12-year-old (if he is ODD). There's a huge maturity-time-lag with ADHD/ODD individuals.
I'm serious, download the eBook and try the techniques on him. If you don't get any benefit from the eBook, just email me and I'll give you a refund. It's that simple. You'll drive yourself nuts if you don't know how to deal with an ODD personality - I promise.
Mark @ www.MyOutOfControlTeen.com