We are facing some challenging times ahead...

Hi, We are facing some challenging times ahead and I would like some advice on how to handle this with our 16 year old son. We moved to the town we are in now in the U.S. about 2.5 years ago from Canada. At the time our son had just started Grade 9. We had some rough times with him refusing to do school work, not caring about school and just being very angry. Things had just turned around with him recently when his Dad's company decided to close down without much warning. His Dad won't have any trouble finding a new job but we likely will need to move again.

As you can imagine, this prospect is not going over well with our son. He is saying he wants to stay here to finish high school. Unfortunately with his past academic efforts or lack of them, he isn't doing great at school. He is in his Junior year but he is a few credits shy of graduating on schedule as he has failed a couple of semesters in 2 courses.

Also, he does not have a job and he isn't driving. How do we handle this?? Do we just insist that he come with us as he is not ready to live on his own? Do I stay behind with him until he graduates and have his Dad commute on weekends for this time?

The issue I have with this is that if our son decides to not make a real effort to pass at school he could drag out the moving indefinitely.

Do you have any suggestions on how to handle this??? Thanks in advance, C.


Click here for the answer...

Yes ...there actually is audio on the Online Version of the ebook.

Hi Mark,

We're working hard on improving things with our son.
Success is in small steps but there is definitely
improvement. Thanks for your help and for talking with
us on the phone several weeks ago.

I see from some of your comments on the blog that I
have just had access to the written book, not to the
audio book, which seems to have more information in
it.

How do I access it? I've downloaded the link that says
online book and audio book, but still don't see the
audio. Do I have to pay something extra for this?

Thanks,

J.

---------------------------------


No ...you don't have to pay extra.

1. Go to www.myoutofcontrolteen.com
2. Click on "Online Version"
3. Save to desktop
4. Open the ebook using your password

…then on each page of the Online Version you should see 3 buttons (one is a play button, one is a stop button, and one is a pause button).

The "live"audio recording of the parenting-workshop (195 minutes total time) is divided into 2 - 5 minute sections throughout the eBook. Each audio section, Power Point Presentation, and video corresponds to the accompanying text.


Mark

www.MyOutOfControlTeen.com

Stealing all the money on the debit card...

Mark, Thank you for your time. I very much appreciate your offer of a phone call. I'm actually in England so I'd have to check the charges to phone you in the States. It might be better to have an online chat. I feel a bit talked out today as we've spent the last week talking very intensely- myself and my wife- a couple of very difficult sessions with my daughter in the aftermath of her stealing all the money on the debit card. I've also talked to a few people on helplines and even a clinician from an organisation called Youngminds. It starts to get very tangled up when you go over and over the same things. I was beginning to think that things had calmed down -less arguments-she is either up in her room or out with her friends. She was disturbing our sleep every night by coming in late and of course then she'd stay in bed very late or be at work so we wouldn't see her but at least the rows had largely stopped but largely because we had stopped talking. And then she stole all this money making us feel desperate all over again. If you let me know when is a good time to contact you I would like to do so. Thanks, P. 

 __________________________ 

 

 Hi P., “Talking to” and “trying to reason with” the daughter-unit are just more traditional parenting strategies that will have little (if any) positive effect. Also, allowing her to stay out late ...and allowing her to stay in her room and sleep late are just other forms of over-indulgence. I understand that it makes things easier in the short run (to have her 'out of the way' so to speak in her room), but as you will find out (or maybe you already have found out), it makes things much more difficult in the long run. 

Mark  www.MyOutOfControlTeen.com