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Hi Mark, Thanks for your reply re things worsening again at home. As far as can tell we are doing about 95% of the things you suggest but I will concede we do miss a thing here and there on reflection. M___ gave her some money ($1) the other day because they had gone down to the sea with friends and were jumping off the local pier which was a bit high. The other dad said to his kids that if they were brave and jumped off, he would give them some money so then A___ wanted some and M___ gave in (she did jump off). I got a bit cross but he said she'd earned it-I disagreed because I thought what she was doing was not actually work. I am saying no to EVERY request for a material item or privilege and (as you suggest) telling her how she can earn the item whereas M___ I feel is not taking it all to the "nth" degree and she is trying to take hold of the reins again. After a particularly bad week of disrespect and aggravation, I suspended her allowance but have re-instated it as...

Adult consequences that result when one has been raised by an over-indulgent parent— · Attitude toward life: Self-indulgent, bored, apathetic, restless, no initiative. · Attitude toward others: Passive expectation of getting from others. · Attitude toward sex/marriage: Attaches to partners who indulge him. May use attractiveness or pretend weakness. · Attitude toward work: Expects them to anticipate his wishes. Hates to work. Can't find a job. No career decisions, no preparation, or persistence. As these adults were growing up, here’s what happened: They were given their freedom to choose and decide for themselves. They were not given much, if any, discipline or rules. Their parents were very loving and nurturing, but had great difficulty saying "no" and setting limits. Children with this parenting style tend to have more behavioral problems as adults. Common traits among these children when they grow up: · Cannot maintain employment or constantly moves from job to job · ...

Both my husband and I work. Thus, or son is home alone during the day (after school). We cannot supervise him and have told him not to have any friends over while we are away. He violates this request regularly. Any advice? ````````````````````````` As dual-earner families have become the norm, the different kinds of 'time' kids spend with parents has become an important issue. I suggest that simple parental presence or absence is not necessarily the main problem for teens that are irresponsible with “home alone” time. Rather, it is the lack of trust between parent and teen. All relationships are based on trust. Kids want and need to trust their parents. Parents want (and need) to trust their kids. Trust makes honest communication possible; it builds relational bridges; it gives meaning to our respective roles; it provides security; it stimulates responsibility and caring. If a teen never learns to trust, the results can be devastating. “Trusting” must be lear...