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The Science of Rebellion: Understanding the Psychology Behind Teen Defiance and Growth

Adolescence, typically spanning from ages 10 to 19, is a pivotal and transformative stage of development characterized by profound shifts in physical, emotional, and social realms. During this time, teenagers often engage in rebellious behaviors that can perplex parents, educators, and caregivers. To comprehend these behaviors fully, it's essential to delve into the psychological underpinnings of teenage defiance, illuminating how it serves as an avenue for personal growth, identity formation, and social exploration.


### Hormonal Changes and Emotional Volatility


As teenagers approach puberty, their bodies undergo rapid hormonal fluctuations that significantly affect their mood and behavior. The release of hormones such as testosterone in boys and estrogen in girls can lead to intense emotions, increased sensitivity, and heightened reactions to social situations. This volatility can manifest as anger, sadness, or anxiety, creating the ideal breeding ground for rebellious behavior as adolescents grapple with feelings they are often ill-equipped to manage.


### Brain Development: The Tug-of-War Between Emotion and Reason


At the same time, the adolescent brain is undergoing dramatic changes. Recent research in neuroscience reveals that while the limbic system—the brain’s emotion center—matures significantly during these years, the prefrontal cortex, which governs rational thinking and impulse control, develops much more slowly. This imbalance explains why teenagers might engage in impulsive, sometimes reckless behaviors that seem irrational to adults. They often feel an irresistible pull toward risk-taking, whether it’s challenging authority, experimenting with substances, or pushing curfew limits, driven by an emotional response rather than a logical assessment of consequences.



### Border Testing: A Natural Exploration of Limits


Testing limits is a critical part of an adolescent's journey toward independence. When teens push back against family rules—whether by negotiating later curfews, defying household chores, or experimenting with personal style—they aren’t merely seeking to annoy their parents; they are exploring their capabilities and asserting their individuality. Each act of rebellion represents a step toward self-discovery, a way for them to gauge the boundaries of their freedom and agency.


### Identity Formation: Crafting the Self


As adolescents experiment with different identities, their rebellious actions may reflect deep-seated explorations of self. They might adopt contrasting styles, shift friend groups, or align with various social causes—all tied to a quest for personal and collective identity. It's during this tumultuous phase that they navigate complex questions about who they are, what they believe in, and where they fit in the broader context of society.


### The Dynamics of Peer Pressure


The adolescent brain is particularly attuned to peer approval, often valuing social bonds over familial ties. This desire can drive teens to engage in rebellious behaviors, such as experimenting with substance use or participating in risky activities, to gain acceptance from their peers. Acts of defiance, such as skipping school or breaking curfews, may be pursued more for the sake of conformity than personal desire. Understanding this dynamic can help adults recognize that these actions are often less about the rebellious act itself and more about the social context in which they occur.


### Personality Traits and Rebelliousness


Some adolescents may naturally exhibit more rebellious tendencies due to their personality traits. For instance, those with high levels of sensation-seeking—characterized by a strong desire for novel experiences—may engage in riskier behaviors simply as an outlet for this trait. Alternatively, a temperamental predisposition toward emotional sensitivity may lead some teens to react more strongly to perceived constraints, resulting in oppositional behavior.


### Environmental Influences: Support vs. Restriction


The social and familial environments wield significant influence over a teenager's rebelliousness. Supportive environments characterized by open communication and mutual respect can mitigate acts of defiance. Adolescents who feel understood by their parents are more likely to express their needs and negotiate boundaries without resorting to outright rebellion. Conversely, overly strict or authoritarian parenting can provoke a stronger reaction, compelling teens to rebel more vehemently against prescribed rules and limitations.


### Channeling Rebellion into Positive Outlets


Instead of framing teenage rebellion as a purely problematic behavior, caregivers can utilize these moments as teachable experiences. For instance, allowing teenagers to voice their opinions, engage in discussions about rules, and question norms can enhance critical thinking and empower them to navigate future challenges thoughtfully. When adolescents feel that their voices are heard and respected, they are more likely to channel their rebellious impulses into constructive avenues.


### Establishing Boundaries While Fostering Autonomy


Creating an environment that allows for both boundary-setting and autonomy is key. Adults can establish clear expectations while inviting teenagers to participate in discussions regarding their freedoms. For example, negotiating consequences for rule violations or discussing the rationale behind household expectations can foster a sense of shared responsibility. This collaborative approach not only respects the teenager's growing need for independence but also reinforces the importance of accountability.


The teenage years are often characterized by emotional upheaval, identity exploration, and an intense desire for independence. For caregivers of troubled teens, navigating this complex landscape can be particularly challenging. While many adolescents naturally seek to assert their individuality and autonomy, troubled teens may exhibit defiance and rebellion as they grapple with personal struggles. Striking a balance between setting essential boundaries and encouraging a sense of autonomy can seem like a daunting task, but it is crucial for fostering healthy development. This article will delve into effective strategies that promote autonomy while ensuring that teens feel secure and accountable.


## Understanding the Quest for Autonomy


Adolescence marks a transformative period when young individuals begin to forge their own identities. It is a time when they transition from the protective confines of childhood into the uncharted waters of adulthood. This burgeoning desire for independence lays the groundwork for vital self-discovery and personal growth. However, for troubled teens—who may face emotional, behavioral, or mental health challenges—this quest for autonomy can often manifest as resistance or opposition to parental authority. Recognizing the innate need for autonomy is pivotal in understanding and addressing the behaviors of these adolescents effectively.


## The Crucial Role of Boundaries


Establishing well-defined boundaries is a cornerstone of parenting that offers essential structure and stability in a teenager's life. Boundaries serve as guidelines that help teens discern acceptable behavior and understand the ramifications of their actions. However, imposing overly strict or inflexible rules can inadvertently lead to feelings of resentment and rebellion in teens. Therefore, it is essential to establish boundaries that not only promote safety but are also perceived as reasonable and adaptable.


### Key Principles for Effective Boundary Setting


1. **Collaborative Approach:** Invite your teen to participate actively in the boundary-setting process. Engage in open discussions where they can voice their thoughts, preferences, and concerns. By co-creating rules, you empower them and instill a sense of ownership over the agreed-upon guidelines, fostering an atmosphere of mutual respect.


2. **Be Clear and Specific:** Vague boundaries can lead to confusion and may result in misunderstandings or conflicts. It’s vital to articulate rules in a straightforward manner and ensure that your teen comprehends not only what is expected but also the rationale behind those expectations. For instance, rather than stating “be home by curfew,” specify “please arrive home by 10 PM to ensure you get enough rest for school the next day.”


3. **Utilize Natural Consequences:** Allowing teens to face the natural outcomes of their decisions can be an impactful teaching method. For example, if your child neglects their school assignments, let them experience the repercussions of a poor grade rather than intervening immediately. This approach not only reinforces responsibility but also encourages them to make more informed choices in the future.


4. **Flexibility and Adaptability:** As teenagers mature, their needs and capabilities change as well. Be open to revisiting and adjusting rules in response to their growth and improved behavior. Showing flexibility in boundaries conveys trust and acknowledges their increasing independence.


### Strategies for Promoting Independence


1. **Encourage Decision-Making:** Empower your teen to make choices within the framework of established boundaries. This can range from everyday decisions—such as selecting their outfit or choosing extracurricular activities—to more significant issues, like managing their academic workload. Providing them with opportunities to make age-appropriate decisions fosters critical thinking and confidence.


2. **Support Individual Goals and Interests:** Take an active interest in your teen’s passions and aspirations. Engage them in conversations about their ambitions, whether they pertain to academics, sports, or creative pursuits. Help them set attainable goals and celebrate their accomplishments, no matter how small. This positive reinforcement not only boosts their self-esteem but also reinforces their motivation to explore their interests independently.


3. **Create Safe Spaces for Expression:** Cultivate an environment where your teen feels comfortable sharing their thoughts and emotions without fear of judgment. Actively listen to their concerns, and validate their feelings, making it clear that their opinions matter. This open dialogue encourages emotional expression and reinforces their belief in their autonomy.


4. **Teach Problem-Solving Skills:** Equip your teen with effective problem-solving abilities by guiding them through real-life scenarios. Discuss various situations they may encounter and brainstorm potential solutions together. This collaborative problem-solving process not only enhances their critical thinking skills but also prepares them to navigate challenges independently.


## Balancing Boundaries and Autonomy -- Achieving a harmonious balance between setting boundaries and promoting autonomy requires ongoing dialogue and patience. Here are some additional tips for maintaining this crucial balance:


- **Regular Check-Ins:** Establish routine discussions to assess your teen’s feelings about the boundaries in place. Use these moments to adjust expectations as necessary and reinforce your commitment to their well-being and growth.


- **Model Positive Behavior:** Serve as a role model by demonstrating healthy boundary-setting and responsible decision-making in your own life. Your behavior can serve as a powerful example of how to manage independence within defined limits.


- **Maintain Open Communication:** Encourage your teen to communicate openly about their feelings regarding the boundaries you set. Establishing this practice can help mitigate misunderstandings and foster a deeper sense of trust between you.


- **Seek Professional Guidance if Needed:** If you encounter persistent challenges, consider consulting a mental health professional specializing in adolescent behavior. They can provide tailored strategies and insights that benefit both you and your teen, enhancing your efforts to foster independence within a framework of appropriate boundaries.


The science of rebellion in adolescence is multifaceted and must be viewed through the lens of the developmental, psychological, and social factors at play. Recognizing that acts of defiance often serve as crucial milestones in an adolescent's journey toward maturity can empower parents, educators, and caregivers to respond with empathy and understanding. By fostering open lines of communication, encouraging autonomy, and nurturing a supportive environment, adults can help steer rebellious behavior toward growth and self-discovery. Understanding rebellion not only enlightens the experience of navigating adolescence but also enriches relationships, ultimately contributing to the emergence of resilient, independent young adults better equipped to face the world beyond their teenage years.


Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
By

When to Consider Inpatient Treatment for Your Troubled Teenager

Raising a teenager can often feel like navigating a complex maze, especially when faced with behavioral and mental health challenges. For some adolescents, these struggles may reach a point where outpatient therapy is no longer sufficient to address their needs. It is at this crossroads that many parents contemplate the necessity of inpatient treatment. However, determining the appropriate moment for such a significant decision can be overwhelming. Below are key indicators and detailed considerations that can help guide your decision-making process.


### Key Indicators That Your Teen May Need Inpatient Treatment


1. **Severe Emotional Distress**: Pay close attention to whether your teenager exhibits persistent feelings of sadness, anxiety, or anger that negatively impact their daily life. Signs may include prolonged periods of crying, irritability, loss of interest in previously enjoyed activities, or an inability to concentrate. If your teen’s emotions seem overwhelming and unmanageable, it could signify that they need more intensive help.


2. **Risk of Self-Harm or Suicidal Thoughts**: If your teenager openly expresses thoughts of self-harm, suicidal ideation, or exhibits self-destructive behaviors, it is crucial to act immediately. Threats or gestures towards self-harm must be taken seriously, and a professional evaluation should be sought without delay. Inpatient treatment provides a safeguarded environment where your teen can receive round-the-clock care, immediate intervention, and crisis management tailored to their needs.


3. **Substance Abuse Issues**: If your teenager has begun using drugs or alcohol as a coping mechanism, the consequences can be dire, affecting their mental and physical health. Indicators of substance abuse may include a decline in academic performance, changes in friend groups, secretive behavior, or the presence of unusual paraphernalia. Inpatient rehabilitation programs can provide a comprehensive approach to detoxification and recovery, alongside therapeutic support aimed at preventing relapse.


4. **Escalating Behavioral Problems**: Consider whether your teen has been displaying increasingly concerning behaviors, such as engaging in dangerous activities, becoming verbally or physically aggressive, or consistently arguing with family members. If these behaviors become unmanageable and threaten their safety or the safety of others, professional intervention is essential. Inpatient treatment can offer a structured environment where they can learn to manage their emotions and reactions effectively.


5. **Inability to Function in Daily Life**: Observe if your teenager is struggling to carry out essential daily tasks such as keeping up with schoolwork, maintaining friendships, completing household chores, or even practicing basic self-care. If their mental health has reached a point where they cannot engage with reality as they once did, inpatient care can provide a focused approach to help them regain stability and functionality.


### Benefits of Inpatient Treatment


- **Structured and Safe Environment**: Inpatient facilities provide a highly structured routine that can cultivate a sense of stability for teens who may be feeling chaotic or overwhelmed. With a set schedule for therapy sessions, meals, recreational activities, and downtime, adolescents can better adapt to the healing process.


- **Comprehensive, Multidisciplinary Care**: Inpatient programs typically offer an integrated approach, featuring a team of experts that includes therapists, counselors, psychiatrists, social workers, and educators. This collaborative environment ensures that each aspect of your child’s needs—emotional, mental, and educational—are addressed cohesively.


- **Focused Time for Recovery**: Being in an inpatient setting allows your teenager to focus intensely on their mental health without the distractions of daily life—like academic pressures, social expectations, and family stresses. This dedicated time can facilitate deeper therapeutic work and personal insights.


### Making the Decision


The decision to place your teenager in inpatient treatment requires careful consideration and often evokes feelings of uncertainty and fear. It is advisable to engage in discussions with mental health professionals who can evaluate your teen's unique situation and offer tailored recommendations. Open conversations with your child can also foster a sense of inclusion and understanding, helping them grasp the importance of the treatment while reassuring them of your support throughout the process.


### Conclusion


In conclusion, if your teenager is grappling with substantial emotional challenges, exhibiting self-harm tendencies, dealing with substance abuse, showing concerning behavioral shifts, or struggling to manage daily responsibilities, it may be time to explore inpatient treatment options. Each family’s circumstances are distinct, and prioritizing comprehensive professional advice is essential in making an informed choice for your child's well-being. By doing so, you can set your teenager on the path toward recovery, resilience, and a brighter future.


Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
By

He knows exactly how to push her buttons and she gets so upset she usually just explodes in anger followed by tears...

I first want to start out by saying THANK YOU. Although I have only completed the first weeks session I already feel like there is hope for our family.

I have a 15 year old son (will turn 16 in one month) who was diagnosed with ADHD in first grade and diagnosed with Bipolar disorder in the 6th grade. Currently his ADHD is stable with Adderall and his bipolar is being treated with Abilify. I dont think the Abilify is the answer however. I have learned to cope with alot of his 'difficulties" but there are 2 problems that I would call a "emergency."

I also have a 14 year our daughter who is a basket of nerves. My son and her HATE each other. He knows exactly how to push her buttons and she gets so upset she usually just explodes in anger followed by tears. When she is upset there is no reasoning with her until she calms down. I can almost see the "excitement" in my son’s eyes when he makes her cry. She is so vulnerable right now. He knows she is very aware of her figure and looks so he is constantly calling her fat (although she is not fat at all). She then comes back at him with retard and why don’t we "send him away". I fear what this is doing to her self-esteem and emotional needs.

My second problem is his vulgar language. He is constantly using fowl language on a daily basis usually with no rhyme or reason. He just yells out a long string of bad language for no reason. He is also very open about sex. He talks about it a lot and constantly makes "sexual noises".

Please believe me when I say, I will continue with your program but right now I feel like 3 weeks is a eternity and I fear our family will fall apart before I get to the end. Do you have any quick advice to help us cope?

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Thanks so much for your help!

C.

`````````````

Hi C.,

Re: He knows exactly how to push her buttons and she gets so upset she usually just explodes in anger followed by tears.

You’ll want to use the strategies in Sessions 3 & 4 for this. But allow me to elaborate a bit before you rush through those sessions in search of a magic bullet.

Mothers of teenagers or preteenagers may be troubled by the amount of fighting, both verbal and physical, that goes on between their children. This is a common problem in homes with adolescents and one many mothers find particularly difficult and upsetting. One mother said, "They are constantly bickering and yelling. There's no peace in the house anymore. They won't listen to me, and nothing I do seems to have any effect on them. Why do they hate each other so?"

If mothers experience these kinds of problems and concerns, it may help if they try to gain a better understanding of sibling battles and then develop a plan for dealing with them in their home.

In this society, people have the expectation that they will love and get along well with everyone in their family. They always expect to feel positive toward their mothers, brothers, sisters, spouse and children. Most people, however, have at least some times when they don't feel very loving toward each other.

Relationships within a family are close, both emotionally and physically, and very intense. When the television show mothers have been looking forward to is being drowned out by the cheerleading practice in the basement, or when the turkey leg they were saving for a snack is missing from the refrigerator, or when their spouse is gleefully telling a crowd of friends how they dented the car fender, they are not likely to feel loving. Because they are so close, family members have a greater power than anyone else to make other members feel angry, sad, confused -- and loving. This is as true for children and adolescents as it is for adults.

Most siblings have probably been good friends and good enemies as they have grown. Having a sibling provides an opportunity to learn to get along with others. Especially when siblings are younger, they may fight bitterly, but they will probably be playing together again an hour later.

For example, a child will say something hateful to a sibling, knowing full well they will still be siblings and friends when the fight is over. If the same thing was said to a playmate outside the family, that playmate might take his or her marbles and go home for good. Thus, children learn from relationships with siblings just how certain words or actions will affect another person without the fear of losing the person's friendship.

Siblings fight for a number of reasons:

  • They fight because they are growing up in a competitive society that teaches them that to win is to be better: "I saw it first." "I beat you to the water."
  • They fight because they are jealous: "He got a new bike. I didn't. They must love him more than they love me."
  • They fight because they want a parent's attention, and the parent has only so much time, attention and patience to give.
  • They fight over ordinary teasing which is a way of testing the effects of behavior and words on another person: "He called me..." "But she called me...first."

Children need not weeks or months but years to learn some of the socially approved ways to behave in relationships. Lessons about jealousy, competition, sharing and kindness are difficult to learn, and, indeed, some adults still haven't learned them.

Adolescents fight for the same reasons younger children fight. But adolescents are bigger, louder and better equipped physically and intellectually to hurt and be hurt by words and actions.

From a parent's point of view, they "ought" to be old enough to stop that kind of behavior. What mothers may forget is that adolescents are under pressure from many different directions. Physical and emotional changes and changes in thinking cause pressures, as do changing relationships with mothers and friends.

Teenagers may be concerned about real or imagined problems between their mothers. They feel pressure about the future as adults and about learning to be an adult.

In many ways, teenagers are in greater need than ever for parental love, attention and concern and for a belief that they are as good as their siblings. The adolescent may not recognize these needs or may be too embarrassed to express them verbally, so fighting with siblings as a way to get parental attention may actually increase in adolescence.

In truth, children don't really hate each other, at least not all the time. As children mature and learn to control their energies and anxieties, chances are they will be good friends.

Mothers can recognize the reasons for the fighting and make up their minds that they will not tolerate it. It's not easy to stick to that resolution! However, many mothers have found that sticking to that resolution is the most important factor in bringing peace to their home.

Mothers should tell adolescents that while it's normal to have disagreements, the constant fighting upsets them and they value peace at home. They can say they will no longer be the judge and jury over the siblings' disputes and they will not stand for it! Then, they must stand by the resolution.

One mother reported that every time a fight started, she would say to his adolescents, "You're fighting. I'm leaving." And then she would go out to work in the yard or take a drive or run an errand -- but she simply walked away from the fighting. Another mother used a similar tactic. When the fighting began, she said, "Call me when it's over." Then she went to her bedroom, slamming the door to emphasize her point. Another parent made his adolescents leave the house when they began fighting.

In each of these cases, the mothers demonstrated that fighting would not get their attention and they would not get involved in the fight. Other mothers have had success in imposing penalties for fighting, such as fines deducted from allowances or a certain amount of grounding for each fighter. These mothers are showing adolescents the cost of fighting is higher than the reward. Whatever tactic mothers use, if they are consistent and stick to their guns, they will almost certainly be successful in reducing the amount of fighting between their children.

Living with fighting adolescent siblings is not pleasant. If mothers can remain calm in the face of battling teenagers, if they can retain their sense of humor and if they put up a determined and united front, they will find the war in their living room will end before long.

As a parent, do you:

  • Avoid initiating competition among children?
  • Be sure older children are not usually forced to give in to younger ones because "he's little" or "she doesn't know better?"
  • Believe there can be something good in sibling fighting?
  • Make sure your adolescents realize they are each unique and have a special set of strengths?
  • Praise adolescents for being who they are not just for what they can do?
  • Realize adolescents and younger children need to be given the right to decide not to share at least some of the time?
  • Recognize that each child is different?
  • Set aside some time to be alone with each child?
  • Talk to the adolescents about their fighting?

Here’s some more tips:

  1. Be available to listen patiently to the problem and control your emotions. Typically mothers have more insight into solving a problem, so give them positive suggestions they can use to work the problem out with their sibling.
  2. Don't intervene, but do give them guidance.
  3. Don't take sides -- remain neutral.
  4. Encourage teenagers to work out issues constructively. Do not allow aggressive behavior such as name calling or hitting.
  5. Express to each of your children that you care for each of them as individuals and love them unconditionally.
  6. Give them the opportunity to work out their problems on their own.
  7. Help enforce the rules by outlining consequences when rules are broken.
  8. Help them recognize each other's individuality.
  9. Insist that they try to cooperate first.
  10. Overcome your own competitive nature.
  11. Share an interest in their activities.
  12. Spend time with them individually.
  13. Teach your children good communication techniques, problem solving skills, and the importance of compromise.


Re: My second problem is his vulgar language.

Teens equate swearing to a rite of passage. As parents we can help them learn healthier ways of expressing and developing maturity. The first step to cleaning up teen talk is listening to your teen. When you ascertain in what scenarios and environments he typically swears, you can help him find alternatives to express himself.

Does your son try to project confidence or superiority when he swears? Does he demonstrate anguish, disgust or disdain in himself or peers with cursing? Do you hear your son causally and subconsciously dropping profanities intermittently throughout casual conversations? Knowing the prime times your son swears will help you choose a course of action to clean up the cursing.

Teens frequently opt for strong language as the result of peer pressure. When she asked her fifteen-year-old son James why he selects such strong language to convey his point of view, Julie from Indianapolis was astonished by her teen’s straightforward answer. “I talk just like all my friends. We don’t mean anything and it’s not like adults don’t say those things” was James' enlightening response. Although it may appear cavalier, James' explanation is familiarly synonymous with beliefs of his peers.

Realizing that her son and his friends were trying to out-do each other in a ritual game of whose language packs the most shock value, Julie decided she wanted to break her son’s habit of vulgarity. “We talked about better ways he could grab his friend’s and acquaintance’s attention,” states Julie “I tried to impress that acting older didn’t automatically mean someone would believe he’s mature.”

Many parents like Julie also find explaining that swearing is not an impressive trait or something that is respected and admired provides clarity. When teens realize that vulgarity or excessive slang has an affect that is ironically opposite than their desired perception of maturity, they are less inclined to taint their vocabulary with swearing. Helping your teen find an intelligent means to express himself, and thus demonstrate true maturity, will both curb swearing and help him achieve his desired goal.

I also suggest parents model the language they expect their teens and tweens to utilize. Reinforcing positive expressions of various emotions lets teens know there’s another way to same the same thing. Of course, we’re all human and can possibly accidentally or occasionally let a slang word slip. The frustration of stalled traffic or of dropping a heavy can on top of your foot can cause the most restrained individual to use an inappropriate word.

Acknowledging that you’re aware you made a regrettable word choice helps teens respect the lessons you’re aiming to instill. Demonstrating your remorse for using a curse word offers your teen a glimpse into your humanistic persona.

Additionally helping your teen realize there are consequences to all of his actions -- including swearing -- provides another deterrent. If your teen has to pay a predetermined ‘fee’ or ‘toll’ for every profanity used, he may think twice about spending his hard earned allowance on curse words. A curse word cookie jar worked miraculously for Karen’s son. “After a few weeks of paying for his language, he decided he’s give up swearing. It was just too expensive,” Karen happily proclaimed.

Good luck …stay in touch,

Mark

My Out-of-Control Teen

By

Teens and Sexual Promiscuity

"Why do younger teenagers nowadays start having sex in the first place? How do I even approach this topic with my daughter? She just says that 'everyone does it -- it's no big deal'. When I was a teenager, I would never even think about having sex with my boyfriend at the time. I guess this shows how old I am."

The topic of sexuality and teens often makes moms and dads - and adolescents - uncomfortable. It can be difficult to even broach the subject of sexuality, and even more difficult should the mother or father suspect their teenager is sexually promiscuous. 
 
Few moms and dads want to confront the issues of sexual promiscuity or inappropriate sexual behavior in their kids, yet avoiding such behavioral problems can be as risky as the behaviors themselves. Not only does sexual promiscuity cause serious health risks to your teenager, it can damage self-esteem and emotional health as well.

Adolescents often partake in risk-taking behaviors. This seems to be a common theme among teens, but it can become a serious issue in troubled teens. Sex may become an outlet for a struggling adolescent's frustrations, much in the same way drugs and alcohol serve as an outlet. In this way, sex becomes a drug, a way to escape feelings and emotional confusion. However, as with any drug, there is a backlash. Any adolescent who is acting out sexually will begin to feel a diminished sense of value and self-esteem.

In some cases, sex can be used as a weapon or defense. A teen might see promiscuous sex as a way of showing the parent that he or she is "free," a grown-up, someone who can "do whatever" they want to do. Allowing a teenager to continue to see sex in such an emotionally immature and self-destructive manner can lead to long-term problems with intimate relationships.

Environment, age of partner and perceived family support may affect young people's decisions to have sex. While the media bombards us with alarming statistics about the number of teenagers having sex, few reports shed light on what might encourage teens to become sexually active in the first place. Three studies offer some insight into sexually active teens: environment, age of partner and perceived family support may affect young people's decisions to have sex.

In a study presented at a meeting of the American Public Health Association (APHA), researchers at the University of Kentucky followed 950 teenagers at 17 high schools in Kentucky and Ohio from 9th to 11th grades. They found evidence that teens who have intercourse tend to think their friends are too, even if they're not. "You're 2.5 times more likely to have sex by the 9th grade if you think your friends are having sex -- whether or not they really are," says Katharine Atwood, assistant professor at the Kentucky School of Public Health. 
 
 
Plus, teens tended to overestimate how many of their friends were sexually active. Only 33 percent of kids in the study had had sex by the 9th grade, but 31 percent said that most or all of their friends had had sex. "If you can persuade them that fewer are having sex than they think," she says, "that can have a significant impact on their behavior."

Among young girls, a partner's age is a risk factor for sexual activity. "The younger the girl is at the age of first intercourse, the more likely she is to have a much older partner," says Harold Leitenberg, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the University of Vermont. His study, published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, found that of 4,201 girls in 8th through 12th grades, those who lost their virginity between ages 11 and 12 tended to have partners five or more years older. 
 
For girls who had sex later in adolescence, the partner's age disparity was much smaller. Early sexual initiation was also associated with a number of behavioral problems. "Ignoring the age of the partners, the earlier a girl was when she first had intercourse, the greater her risk of suicide attempts, alcohol use, drug abuse, truancy and pregnancy," Leitenberg says.

The good news is that while teen sex may not be wholly preventable, the health risks it involves can be reduced through communication within the family. More research presented at the APHA meeting showed that frequent parent-child discussions about sex and its dangers may prevent teenagers from engaging in risky sexual behavior. 
 
Researchers at Emory University questioned 522 sexually active African-American adolescents about the openness and support that their families provided. Adolescents who felt that their families were more supportive were less likely to have unprotected sex, and thus were at a lesser risk for pregnancy and disease.

==> My Out-of-Control Teen: Help for Parents
By

You Are Not Your Teenager's "Buddy"

Mark …I have a simple question: I try to be my daughter’s friend, because her father is not involved at all in her life. Is this good or bad? Signed, Single Mom
_________________

I regularly see a lot of evidence that today’s teens are trying to act older while today’s parents are trying to act younger. So you've got kids trying to be adults, and adults trying to be kids. It makes for a weird dynamic – and confuses the teenager as to who's the role model.

In those cases where the parent is a ‘buddy,’ the parent-child relationship tends to be a love-hate relationship.

I understand that the family unit itself has changed (e.g., more single parents, gay parents, parents who are dating, etc.). And I also know it’s hard for the single parent to be both a “friend” and a “disciplinarian.” But you have to pick one or the other – and your pick should be the one who employs “tough love.”

“Tough love” has 2 components though: (1) the tough part and (2) the nurturing part. It’s very possible to provide a steady diet of ‘tough’ and still have plenty of moments for ‘love’ (i.e., moments where you and your teenager are emotionally close, united and bonded).

In any event, you are not a buddy! She has other buddies, but she has only one parent – you. If she really needs an “adult” buddy, hook her up with an aunt, a Big Sister (from Big Brothers/Big Sisters Org.), or one of your trusted female adult friends.



 

==> My Out-of-Control Teen: Help for Parents
By

Daughter is Sexually Assaulted

Hello Mark:

This is a strange experience. That is, sending a stranger, albeit we believe, a caring stranger such as you, an e-mail.

My wife and I have used your program with our now 14 year old daughter, but not as fully as we could or should have. Nevertheless, we thought we had used our ‘poker faces’, and given ‘consequences’ lectures effectively, and that a real change (with constant and exhausting monitoring) was taking place. We had a real setback a month or so ago, in terms of inappropriate Facebook activities, and had our daughter cancel her Facebook profile and account.

This was disappointing, but again we thought it was one of a series of setbacks that we thought would diminish in severity and with time.

We were thinking a level of real trust was slowly taking hold. We were wrong! Today is Saturday evening. Yesterday evening we found out that our daughter and her only real friend, (according to her), a 15 year old girlfriend whom she has been very close friends with for the last 2 years, were sexually assaulted in August. The 15 year old girl told an older female friend of her mother’s on Wednesday. The older female friend of the mother left a message with the mother, but the mother only replied to her telephone call yesterday.

The police were called yesterday, and a female police officer took private separate statements from the girls yesterday evening. According to the girls, they were scared about the consequences of their telling anyone what had happened. Apparently the girls had first met 3 older men (mid 20’s?) on the beach. They called our daughter’s girlfriend, who obviously had given them her number. A week or so later, the men called to arrange to meet the girls in the city. They picked them up, stopped at a liquor store, and went to the beach. The girls played on the beach and then drank the liquor that was provided to them by the men. The men then took them to a cabin away from the beach. 3 of the men raped our daughter’s girlfriend, and 2 raped our daughter. The men then drove the girls back to the city.
 

We have been told that the major crime unit will be interviewing the girls this coming week, and speaking with us. Our daughter’s girlfriend was reluctant to do so, but revealed that she had the men’s telephone numbers and their supposed names. My daughter told me today that she and her girlfriend have concluded that it was not their fault that they put themselves in such a situation. At this point my wife and I have been supportive, and have tried to be careful not to condemn them. The interesting point is that the girls feel it is our fault, and the girlfriend’s single mother’s fault. That is, because of their previous activities, we have (we thought) been monitoring their activities more closely. They feel that if we had allowed them a freer rein to associate with their peer group friends, that they would not have gotten into a car with 3 older men and gone to the beach with them.

My wife and I are traumatized and confused. I started to look at your material again. Earlier last year, before we had your material, we went to family counselling to help our daughter, and realized it was a waste of time, money, emotional energy, and gave our daughter a chance to twist and tell tales. After I decided to look at your site again, I realized that I had not fully read all of the material. I know it seems easy to label someone, and to give a diagnosis, but the ODD and ADHD are uncannily accurate. My wife and I are basically teetotallers, and have not had trouble with the law.

We are in a quandary as to what to do next. We know that our daughter and her girlfriend will be given psychiatric assessments and counselling in the next coming weeks, along with an investigation as to the real identities of the rapists. Presumably a trial and court case will ensue if the rapists are caught. A few hours ago, my daughter, wife and I had another screaming match totally unrelated to the rape incident. Actually, our whole life with our daughter has been tense and stressful. It has been a combination of temper tantrums and screaming matches. The ‘poker face’ and ‘consequences’ suggestion helps but does not work all of the time. Our marriage has suffered greatly. Our daughter speaks rudely to me, but mostly to my wife, and has said many vicious and cruel things to her. Many times when my wife has cried about our daughter and our family situation, our daughter has sneered and derided her.

It seems that our daughter and her girlfriend feel relieved to tell their story about the rape, and now feel that they can go about their lives the way they used to. Today they are laughing and carrying on as though everything is normal. Our daughter told my wife last night that now she and her girlfriend will be more cautious. That was all.

What an e-mail I am sending to you, and what a surreal experience we have had since last night. My wife and I do not know what to do next. The real ramifications of the rapes will probably not manifest themselves until years later. We are concerned about this and know that this will have to be dealt with at a later time, but at present are more concerned about the here and now. We feel we have been loving and supporting with no condemnation, but know that the root of the problem with our daughter is still there.

We believe your program has a lot of merit, and know that each situation is different. My wife and I (even though I am told that there is always one more ounce of energy left in out reservoirs when we need it) are thoroughly exhausted mentally and physically. We also have an 18 year old son who has suffered along with us. My wife has stated that in order to cope with our daughter, she is going to give her notice to quit work at the end of this year. We know you are not God, but you do have a lot of experience in working with troubled teens. What would you suggest our best course of action to take is?

Sincerely,

A confused and traumatized father and mother on behalf of a confused and troubled teen…

``````````````````````````````````````

Teenagers and young adults are the age groups at greatest risk for rape -- especially acquaintance rape. About 50% of rape victims are under 18 years of age when they are victimized. Youths 12-17 are two to three times more likely to be sexually assaulted than adults. Most teenagers who are raped or sexually assaulted are victimized by someone they know.

It can be hard to help a child who's keeping a secret from you. Preteens and teenagers often turn to their friends to discuss deeply personal issues — and, unfortunately, something as serious as rape is no exception.

Perhaps your daughter fears you will get angry, thinking she "brought it on" in some way; perhaps you don't openly discuss sexual issues and she would feel uncomfortable telling you.
 

Whatever the reason, reaching out to your daughter and keeping the lines of communication open is crucial to your relationship. Let your daughter know, often, that you're there to listen and want to know if anyone ever harms her.

Someone who's been raped might feel angered, frightened, numb, degraded, or confused. It's also normal to feel ashamed or embarrassed. Some people withdraw from friends and family. Others don't want to be alone. Some feel depressed, anxious, or nervous.

Sometimes the feelings surrounding rape may show up in physical ways, such as trouble sleeping or eating. It may be hard to concentrate in school or to participate in everyday activities. Experts often refer to these emotions — and their physical side effects — as rape trauma syndrome. The best way to work through them is with professional help.

If your daughter has confided in you that she is the victim of rape, it's important to seek medical care right away. A doctor will need to check for STDs and internal injuries. Even if your daughter doesn't get examined right away, it doesn't mean that she can't get a checkup later. A person can still go to a doctor or local clinic to get checked out for STDs, pregnancy, or injuries any time after being raped. In some cases, doctors can even gather evidence several days after a rape has occurred.

Those who have been raped sometimes avoid seeking help because they're afraid that talking about it will bring back memories or feelings that are too painful. But this can actually do more harm than good. Seeking help and emotional support through a trained professional is the best way to ensure long-term healing. Working through the pain sooner rather than later can help reduce symptoms like nightmares and flashbacks. It can also help someone avoid potentially harmful behaviors and emotions, like major depression or self-injury.

Rape survivors work through feelings differently. Ask your daughter what sort of counseling is preferable: Some people feel most comfortable talking one-on-one with a therapist. Others find that joining a support group where they can be with other survivors helps them to feel better, get their power back, and move on with their lives. In a support group, they can get help and might help others heal by sharing their experiences and ideas.

The emotional trauma caused by a sexual assault can be severe and long-lasting. The victim may be affected in many different ways. Although each person is unique, there are some feelings and reactions that most sexual assault victims experience. It may be helpful for your daughter to know about these responses. 
 
However, always remember that even though many victims experience similar reactions, there are still individual differences in how people respond to the trauma of rape. Your daughter may experience some or all of these symptoms. They may occur immediately, or one may have a delayed reaction weeks or months later. The feelings may be very intense at times. Sometimes the feelings seem to go away for a while and then come back again. Certain situations, such as seeing the assailant or testifying in court, may intensify the symptoms or cause them to reoccur.
 

Initially, most sexual assault victims react with shock and disbelief. They may feel numb and dazed, withdrawn and distant from other people. They may want to forget about what happened and avoid people or situations that remind them of the assault.

There may be periods when the victim is preoccupied with thoughts and feelings about the assault. She may have unwanted memories or flashbacks and nightmares. When she thinks about what happened, she may re-experience some of the sensations and feelings she had during the assault, such as fear and powerlessness.

Many survivors experience intense emotions in the aftermath of a sexual assault. At times, she may feel angry. She may also feel afraid, anxious or depressed.

Some victims have physical symptoms, such as sleep disturbances, headaches, and stomachaches. They may find that it is very difficult to concentrate on routine activities. They may also experience changes in your sexuality, such as a loss of interest in sex or avoidance of sexual situations.

Fears about personal safety are an almost universal response to a sexual assault. She may become fearful in situations and places where she was never frightened before. During a sexual assault most victims feel powerless and/or terrified of being killed or seriously harmed. Afterwards, she may continue to feel frightened and vulnerable for a while.

Feelings of guilt and shame are common reactions following a sexual assault. Because of misconceptions about rape, some victims blame themselves, doubt their own judgment, or wonder if they were in some way responsible for the assault. Feelings of guilt and self-blame may be reinforced by the reactions of others, who, because of prevalent myths about rape, may blame the victim or criticize his or her behavior.

The victim may also feel ashamed. Some victims describe feeling dirty, devalued, and humiliated as a result of a sexual assault. Feelings of shame are often related to the powerlessness and helplessness victims experience during a sexual assault. Shame may also be a reaction to being forced by the assailant to participate in the crime.

Re: Alcohol Abuse. Please refer to session #4 in the online version of the eBook.

Mark

==> JOIN Online Parent Support
By

I have decided to send D___ to a boot camp...

Hi Mark-

I have not been in touch for a while. I am still working the steps of the course but I still fall short. I almost need daily reminders of what I am supposed to be doing because its so easy to get caught up in the drama- I have to step back and think Ok what have I learned! I am doing better with sticking to what I say and not getting as emotional when he is pushing me. I am taking alot of time outs. But the bad behavior and defiance still continue just as strong from him.

A few weeks ago he shoved a boy into a wall at school this resulted in a bump on this kids head- his parents called the police and are pressing assault charges. D___ was sent to alternative school. While in alternative school he got in a fight on the school bus along with some other boys and was written a ticket for disorderly conduct and assault.

I have decided to send D___ to a boot camp ...its juvenile behavior modification program. i am a nervous wreck about it - but truly don't know what else to do. I know you work with the courts in your state and was curious if you have seen or had kids go thru these programs and how you feel it works or does not work with your program.

Thanks-

S.

```````````````````````
Hi S.,

Boot camps work well as long as the child is involved in programming, but the "positive behavior changes" do not seem to have longevity. That is, the child returns home from boot camp, then after a two-week honeymoon period in which the parent gets the impression that the child has actually made some improvement, the child reverts back to original behavior.

Boot camps are military-style institutions for defiant and disrespectful teens who have a problem with authority. They learn discipline and structure through military exercises, and rigorous physical training.

The theory of boot camp is that a swift "kick in the ass" will turn around a child who has probably been acting out for years. But in a lot of cases, just a short-term boot camp will not be enough for a teen to turn his or her life around. Boot camps work great if they are followed by a boarding school or other longer-term program.

Privately owned boot camps seem to have a greater affect on teenagers. Surprisingly, the recidivism rate of juveniles who attend state-run boot camps has been said to be as high as 94%, while overall privately owned boot camps have a much lower rate. Boot camps can also be long term (military based boarding schools) or short boot camps (summer boot camps).

Overall, boot camps usually have a definite impact on a teen especially the defiant and disrespectful ones. However, for a lasting change to take place, a boot camp usually needs to be followed by a longer-term program such as a boarding school.

Mark

```````````````````````````````````````````````````

Mark-

This is a private boot camp (not state run) and D___ is most certainly the defiant type. This camp is for a weekend only but when the child "graduates" from camp at the end of the weekend, he is placed on a 3 month probation. They are given certain expectations and if in that 3 months they are messing up I can call his assigned counselor and they will come to my house or call and see if they can turn the situation around. If D___ continues the bad behavior I can have him sent back to camp for a refresher so to speak. The cost is only 200.00 or 100.00 if court ordered and if they have to go back in the 3 month probation period its 25.00. D___ was not court ordered but when we DO go to court for his tickets I can tell the judge what I have dont to try to help D___.

My hope is this boot camp will be an eye opener for him and then along with your program working on the long term changes in the family D___ can have success in changing his life around.

I have had a great deal of frustration lately that so many kids are falling thru the cracks. There just seems to be very little resources for parents in my area that have troubled kids. I am frustrated with summer coming and nothing for them to do that is positive to keep them out of trouble that parents can afford. I am seriosly thinking of approaching the police department or city or schools or all the above in my city to see if we can get some sort of program together that provides activities for kids -volunteer work - swimming whatever to help them belong to something good.

Parents like me that have to be at work have no way to get kids to and from stuff during the day and no money so I am hoping to maybe get volunteers to provide transportation.

I am just in the beginning stages of the idea. I dont know who/where/how/whats but I am growing a passion for it. I thought maybe a website too so programs (like yours) could possibly be referenced as resources for parents. Any thoughts or suggestions? All I know is it took 10 yrs to even find you or any thing like what you offer ..there are just too many people that dont know what to do where to go and we are losing the kids.

THANKS!

S.

My Out-of-Control Teen
By

Parenting Strategies: Behavioral Change for Defiant Troubled Teens and Preteens

  
From the office of Mark Hutten, M.A.
Online Parent Support, LLC
Author of My Out-of-Control Teen

The problem is that most parents of strong-willed, out of control teenagers have tried very hard to regain control -- but with little or no success.  And it seems the harder the parent tries, the more the teenager "acts-out."

I often hear the following statement from parents: "I've tried everything with this child -- and nothing works!"  But when they attend my parent-program, they soon discover they have not tried everything, rather they have tried some things. 

Now there is an online version of the parent-program for working parents who are struggling with their out-of-control teenagers, and you will experience the same success as those who attend the program in person. 

You will learn cut-to-the-chase parenting strategies that work immediately rather than months or years down the road.  And I guarantee your success or you get your money back -- and you can keep the package I am about to offer you.  This is how confident I am that the online version of the parent-program is going to work for you. 






One of many testimonials: 

“Hi mark. I want to thank you so much for putting out the 4 week parenting course. I have completed it and it has literally changed my life. Honestly it worked instantly. I have a foster child who would yell, scream, abuse. Intimidate, swear, punch holes in walls etc if asked to get off the Xbox or to do a job. Yes he has so much trauma and I think is on the spectrum but I kept thinking I don’t think his outbursts are because of this. The bottom line is I was over indulging him. Now he knows nothing is for free and if he wants anything he has to do jobs. I take all technology at the end of each day and if he wants it back the next day he has to do the jobs on the list. I’ve only taken his phone twice for 24 hours since starting the course. That was all it took. Honestly mark, he yelled at me when I told him nothing is for free, not even a donut at the shop. I kept calm and said I’m not arguing. He now can’t drag me into arguments as I keep repeating ‘I’m not arguing’. I could go on and on how he’s changed. It’s only been 3 weeks but no massive melt downs or holes punched in walls. THANK YOUUUUUUUUU”   


The online version is called Online Parent Support (OPS). OPS includes My Out-Of-Control Teen eBook.  In this book, I share over 150 proven techniques to use with your strong-willed, out-of-control teenager.  If parents don’t have these techniques, all they are left with are conventional parenting techniques.  And as they may have discovered, conventional techniques don't work with unconventional teenagers. 

 => Does your child often:
  • lose his temper
  • argue with adults
  • refuse to comply with rules and requests
  • deliberately annoy people
  • blame others for his mistakes and misbehavior

 => Is your child often:
  • touchy and easily annoyed by others
  • angry and resentful
  • spiteful and vindictive

Believe it or not, your child doesn't need counseling.  You don’t need parenting classes.  You don’t need -- nor would you want -- a 250-page manual on how to be a better parent.  Who has time for that?  And you don’t need to go through another year of pain and misery with rebellious, foul-mouthed teenagers with an "attitude."

However, what you may need is someone who has worked with troubled teens and frustrated parents for over 25 years -- and does so for a living -- to show you a set of very effective parenting techniques that are guaranteed to work. That would be me, Mark Hutten, M.A.

OPS includes:
  • Live Audio Recordings of the entire parent-program I conducted at Madison County Youth Center
  • Power Point Presentations and 25 Videos shown during the program 
  • Access to me via email -- always feel free to contact me as often as needed while you begin to implement your new parenting strategies
  • 100% Money Back Guarantee

Whether you have big problems or small problems, teens or preteens, whether you are a single parent, divorced or separated parent, adoptive parent, foster parent, step parent, a traditional two-parent family, or a grandparent raising a grandchild -- this material is guaranteed to work for you.

Initially, the parents who attend my parent-program (the same program you’ll get with Online Parent Support) are at their "wit's end" and describe home-life as “hell's kitchen.” 

A few short weeks after they complete the program (which is divided into 4 sessions, 90 minutes each session), the majority of parents report that problems in their homes have reduced in frequency and severity and are finally manageable.

You’ll be pleasantly surprised at how simple it is to get started with these non-traditional parenting strategies.  Whenever you have a couple spare moments sitting at your computer, you can see how to bring about positive change in your household …change that will reduce parent-child conflict …change that will reduce your stress-level significantly …and change that will increase the likelihood that your child will be a success both at school and in life.


                 *** Purchase This Parenting Program Using PayPal *** 
 

=> Is your child in charge (the tail is wagging the dog)?

=> Does she/he have an "attitude" 24 hours a day, 7 days a week?

=> Is she/he resentful about something that happened in the past and just can’t seem to get over it?

=> Are you concerned that your child is:
  • Having unprotected sex?
  • Hanging with the wrong crowd?
  • Experimenting with drugs or alcohol?

=> Has your child:
  • Lied to you?
  • Stolen from you?
  • Skipped school?
  • Destroyed property?
  • Ran away from home?
  • Had a brush with the law?
  • Refused to follow any rules?


You Can't Lose With My 100%, Ironclad,
"Better-Than-Risk-Free" Money Back Guarantee

I say "better-than-risk-free" because this whole package is yours
to keep even in the unlikely event you decide to ask for a refund.

If for any reason you aren't thrilled and satisfied
with your purchase, just contact me and I'll give you a 100%
prompt and courteous refund ... no questions asked!


Feel free to contact me.  You'll get no "sales pitch" -- just answers to any questions you may have. My email: mbhutten@gmail.com  (I will respond within 24 hours!)

A few emails from parents:

"I just have to let you know that I just started reading your book...I am in tears as I am reading. It is like you have been hanging out in our home, watching us. We are on our 4th therapist in a 3 year period and not one of them have seemed to have a grasp on what we are dealing with, but your first few chapters have summed us up almost immediately. I had to stop and say thank you." -- M.J.

"I had problems with my 15-year-old daughter last year and found your online course. I can’t even begin to tell you how helpful it was in turning my daughter around.  I followed it up with a trip to Uganda – just the 2 of us – for 15 days last summer, which forced us to bond. It’s been a great year this year and I want to thank you for your huge part in that. No more sleepless nights.  Your website gets lots of referrals from me! I think your method utilizing online courses and support groups is brilliant. Warm regards." -- M.H.

"Thank you for your concern for others. My husband and I were at the end of our ropes. I prayed for wisdom and God certainly answered my prayer.  I have already tried some things on the first week actually the day I ordered this and to my amazement - they worked!!  I had already been thinking the turmoil was like a drug for my daughter and I was right.  Thank you so much and God Bless you!" – E.H.

"Tara and I joined your website for our 16 year old quite a few months back. Let me say this after having gone through many different programs for difficult teenagers, your program is very solid. We have told our current counselors and connections about it so that other parents may use your very good resources, too. Our son is to the point now where he no longer argues." – T.M.



                 *** Purchase This Parenting Program Using PayPal ***


Dear Discouraged/Frustrated Parents,

I know I’ve made some pretty strong claims above. And you might be thinking, "This guy is full of it …he must think he can work miracles.”

No, I’m not a miracle worker. But you don’t need a miracle! All you need is this simple set of proven parenting techniques to use with your oppositional, defiant child.

I'm not offering a complete cure for ALL behavior problems, and I'm not trying to claim that every single thing that you'll ever need to help your child is in my eBook. But if you are looking for rock solid and proven solutions to a whole bunch of parenting-predicaments that you have with your out-of-control child, then I'm confident that you can benefit from my help.

For many years, I ran a very successful parent program, but I wanted to take it a step further.  I wanted to reach out to parents worldwide and help them discover that there really is light at the end of the tunnel. That’s when I came up with Online Parent Support (OPS).  Since its launch in 2004, OPS has overwhelmed users and success rates have been phenomenal.

If you're one of those parents who has paid a fortune on must-have parenting eBooks only to find they were full of useless information you could have gotten anywhere, then don’t make the mistake of clicking off this site before you at least call or email me with some specific questions about My Out-of-Control Teen eBook. I guarantee you won't find this information anywhere else.

You could (and may) spend the rest of the afternoon surfing and "researching" only to find that you've gained a wonderful knowledge of what the problem is without any knowledge of what to do about it.

Let’s face it: You have been force-fed garbage and misinformation that will never put your teen back on the right track.  All you have really been doing is building-up even more barriers and creating more stress – for you and your family.

I'm tired of reading all the bad advice out there …I’m tired of seeing teenagers' lives ruined because they just can’t be controlled …and I’m tired of seeing parents chase their tails in a hopeless cycle of frustration, drama and chaos.

I’m giving you the chance to break the cycle of abuse and mistrust …to bring harmony back into your life …and to keep your child from self-destruction. 

Parenting strong-willed, out-of-control children is tough! If you don't know how, that is...

Here’s a recent email from a new member of Online Parent Support. She and her husband sent this email to their son’s Counselor:

“…coming up with a proper diagnosis and treatment has taken us down many roads, all leading to different therapies, parent-education classes, including Jayne Major's course Breakthrough Parenting Services as well as James Lehman's Total Transformation Program. Through countless hours of research and phone calls, we have discovered the different levels of support are dependent on insurance, out of pocket expenses, including potentially selling our home and putting him in a residential treatment center with no guarantees of a positive outcome. Needless to say, quality intervention has been hard to find. Recently we found an on-line course by Mark Hutten called My Out Of Control Teen. It seems the most helpful and pragmatic approach so far. We wanted to share with you where we are in the course so we are all on the same page in helping our son and family through this crisis.”

$29 is really a painless drop in the bucket compared to the money you could lose over time with counseling, parent-education classes, psychiatric evaluations, treatment, etc.

Yes, for the price of dinner at a local restaurant, you will have all the information you need to jump full force into getting peace and respect back in your house again. If you need to justify the expense, skip taking the kids to McDonald's for dinner once this week - and it's paid for.

If you’re going through the same parent-child conflict that most of the other parents who land on this site are going through, then the problems at home and school are not getting better -- they’re steadily getting worse. How much longer are you willing to wait?  I'm guessing that you have already wasted too much time and energy trying to get some real solutions.

I trust that you’ll take a step of faith here and get started with this online program immediately.

~ Mark Hutten, M.A.


                 *** Purchase This Parenting Program Using PayPal ***



==> Frequently asked questions...

==> Emails from a few of the parents who have joined Online Parent Support...

==> A brief biography can be viewed here...


 

_______________________________________

About the author: Mark Hutten, M.A. is the founder of Online Parent Support and a parent coach. He has worked with hundreds of children and teens with behavioral problems over the years. He presents workshops and runs training courses for parents and professionals who deal with troubled children and teens, and is a prolific author of articles and ebooks on the subject.

About Online Parent Support: Online Parent Support was one of the first “online program” for parents with defiant children and teens, and has been helping parents like you since 2003. Dozens of parents join Online Parent Support every day. YOU can be next! You can start your program in 15 min. from now, and you WILL see positive changes in your child’s behavior within the first week -- or your money back! Has your son or daughter been "out-of-control" for several months - if not years? If so, then alarm bells should be going off. You know changes need to happen!

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