My 15 year old daughter has had years worth of problems being accepted by her peers (she was diagnosed with ADHD at age 12). This past summer, she earned enough money to buy her own cell phone and pays a monthly fee for unlimited texting. Her grades have gone from B's to F's. I think she has become addicted to the constant source of contact with peers (regardless of if it is worthwhile, supportive, etc. or not). While I do not micromanage her school work, I have tried to provide incentive. For example, she was told that she could not get her drivers permit without having a 3.0 average. I had her pay for 1/2 of the classroom drivers ed program, but by the time she was 15 1/2 and could get her permit, her grades were all failing and I did not allow her to get the permit until her grades are back to a 3.0. She is continuing to not show any motivation to do anything in her classes. She frequently does not do homework, fails tests and hands in things incomplete, because she says she is busy or too tired. ????? Any suggestions? Thank you!
You are still trying to “manage” her academic performance (by withholding driving privileges and trying to provide incentives).
Whenever you are in doubt about what decision to make, always ask yourself, “Will this foster self-reliance – or dependency in my child?” Clearly, disallowing her to get a driving permit -- and then her license -- fosters dependency (i.e., she has to depend on others for transportation).
It will be helpful for all concerned for you to stop taking ownership of her education – and allow her to get that permit.
My Out-of-Control Teen
- ► 19 (105)
- ► 14 (62)
- ► 13 (52)
- ► 12 (57)
- ► 11 (108)
- ► 10 (145)
- ► 09 (149)
- I almost had to keep from chuckling...
- She screams that she wants to kill me...
- Stepfather Fondled Stepdaughter?
- My husband has been able to access my son's MSN...
- U.S. Boarding Schools: Ohio to Wyoming
- U.S. Boarding Schools: Maine to North Dakota
- U.S. Boarding Schools: Hawaii to Louisiana
- U.S. Boarding Schools: Alabama to Georgia
- Interview with Mark Hutten, M.A. [Psychology Today]
- He smokes weed...
- She lies, drinks, smokes, tries to make me feel gu...
- I have a huge struggle that is brewing...
- I have created a little girl who has total control...
- Last week he was arrested for shoplifting...
- He didn't come home last night...
- Speak softly, and carry a big stick...
- His pediatrician refers to him as a "case study"...
- This program makes a lot of sense to me...
- When Kids Refuse To Attend School: Case Examples
- We do have a situation in hour house...
- Teens Who View Porn on the Internet
- Teens & Money Management
- Her grades have gone from B's to F's...
- These are difficult kids...
- The Insidiousness of Over-Indulgence
- Teen Home Alone
- He definitely has some ODD -ness...
- Over-Indulgence vs. Accountability
- Teens & Stealing
- ▼ 12 (29)
- ► 07 (355)