I've responded throughout your email below:
Hello, We are using your instruction for our out of control teen. We have a 16 yr old son, who over the last year (on & off) has been drinking alcohol, smoking marijuana
Please refer to "Read These Emails From Exasperated Parents" [session #4 - online version of eBook] for recommendations on pot and alcohol.
and hanging out with the wrong group of kids.
Please refer to "Hangin' with the wrong crowd..." below for recommendations on negative peer influence:
He was arrested for possession of drug paraphernalia in his car (misdemeanor in Idaho) and a positive urine for marijuana on 2/6. This is his first encounter with the law but not with his parents. We meet with the probation officer next week to discuss sentencing. My question to you is should we ask for him to spend time in juvenile detention (a weekend) to get a taste of what could become if he continues down this path, or is that something we should leave for the probation officer to hold over his head while on probation.
Fear-based motivation has no longevity. And most out-of-control teens are not intimidated by the prospect of detention. In fact, a tour or visit will actually increase the intrigue.
It is not the norm to send them to JD on the first offence unless the parents request it.
No. And the PO will not detain because you requested it.
He will also get counseling for anger management, family communication, drug and alcohol class, community service, probation for 6 month, monthly drug testing, & evaluation for depression. I want to approach him with tough love but a counselor told us we could also go to far in the discipline process. What are your thoughts?
If you follow the program, you will not be "going to far."
I must say that you will benefit from going back through the online version of the eBook a second time. You have asked me questions that are already addressed there, which tells me you have missed some important pieces.
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