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Hi L.,
Re: By saying he cannot go out, is this correct, or is it like the dishes being broken in the sink scenario?
The clock starts over whenever a child (a) repeats the original offense (e.g., returns home after a curfew time of 10:00 PM), or (b) violates the one-day, two-day, or three-day discipline (e.g., does not stay grounded, uses the cell phone, etc).
Your son is violating the three-day discipline. He should be in the house at 3:00 PM (for example). If he does not return home from school by that time – or if he leaves the house to go over to his girlfriend’s house, the clock starts over. If he chooses to ignore the 3-day-discipline, then he chooses a 7-day-discipline. If he refuses the 7-day-discipline, then you will need to tell him that the police will be called and a run away complaint will be filed.
Parents who refuse to go these extra steps are not really working the program and do not receive the success they had hoped for.
No half measures!
Re: Also can he earn back his privilege of going out on sat night?
Once a privilege is taken away, it should never be returned until the child completes the entire time period of the discipline.
Mark
P.S. Sometimes "tough love" is tougher on the parents than the child.
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