I read with interest your parenting book, we are one of those parents that tried everything including the Beyond Parental Control juvenile help in Singapore.
Our daughter has a history of running away as soon as she does not get her way, the last time for 25 days, with the threat of killing herself and or over dose on drugs.
We finally put her in a very disciplined structured boarding school in Malaysia. It is her 16th birthday on Saturday, and she needs permission to go out.
As this is a privilege she has not earned, nor the trust, we refused the permission. The threats of running away and killing herself were howling in the phone.
I am going thru your book, as to be ready for her first home leave, 2 weeks from now, and the problems are back, before we can implement anything. As soon as she gets a negative answer or a way to earn a privilege - she runs away, does not care if she has no bed, food, as long as she can decide herself how to spend her time.
She was released from the Singapore Girls Home, a juvenile prison on the 22nd after 1 months stay. Tears and promises made us decide to take her out of it and into a boarding school.
This is the 5th school in which we hope she can finish secondary 3. She got expulsed from the others due to bad behavior.
Any advice? If you need more info, we will gladly supply.
Mr. & Mrs. G.
Mr. & Mrs. G.,
First of all, be sure to watch ALL the Instructional Videos in the online version of the eBook. If you only read the printable version of the eBook, you’ll only get about 40% of the total material.
The advice I have is simple and straightforward:
When she returns home, implement session #1 during the first week …session #2 during the second week …and so on. If she chooses to ignore your house rules, then she will also choose to continue her involvement in the Juvenile Justice system. There’s no way around this.
If you can’t control your daughter – the world WILL control her. Let her decide which controlling entity she wants to answer to. It’s not a question or whether or not she will be controlled, rather it’s a question of who will do the controlling – parents or the law. Again – let her decide which. Then, whatever her decision – let go of the outcome. (Easier said than done – but you have no other choice as I see it.)