He's Got 4 Parents.

Hi Mark,

I have read quite a bit of your ebook now. I am finding controlling my anger a problem. I have not found my poker face yet. I do have a question for you though. My son goes to his fathers for dinner every Tuesday night and every other weekend. How do I enforce the discipline?

My son did not earn this past weekends wrestling tournament and was told he could not go, his father took him anyway. So now my son is acting like he got away with something. And I feel like what I say doesn't matter. I except that I cannot control my son's reaction. But, how do I control his father’s actions or reactions? My son has 2 mom's and 2 dad's and none of us get along very well because we have different idea's of what's best for our son.


Hi A-M.,

If he has 2 moms and 2 dads, then you only get 25% of the say-so -- not good odds.

In any event, I would recommend that, if possible, the 4 parents get together and come up with some type of parenting plan that everyone can live with (compromise). A watered-down, weaker plan supported by all 4 parents would be infinitely better than a solid, stronger plan supported by only one parent.

If the other 3 parents are not interested in working WITH you, then let your son know that your rules are different than theirs, and there are consequences for violating your rules while he's on your watch.

I know this is a frustrating situation. You make two steps forward, and then it seems that the other parent pulls you 3 steps back. But don't try to control what they do on their end. Your son will simply have to operate under two or more different sets of rule-structures.



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