HELP FOR PARENTS WITH STRONG-WILLED, OUT-OF-CONTROL CHILDREN AND ADOLESCENTS

Education and Counseling for Individuals Affected by Oppositional Defiant Disorder and ADHD

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She needs to leave, and the sooner the better...

Hello Mark,

I sent you an email the other day about our daughter having a party in our house while we were gone and that she said she didn’t. Well we found beer in our fridge, etc. And lots of other stuff, and she sort of admitted to something going on in the house.

I spoke with her about my feelings and I am not okay with it, but I was able to say how I felt. My husband on the other hand is so upset about it that he isn’t speaking to her. This is often how he handles things with her and they just don’t talk.

I have to agree with my husband that she is very disrespectful to him and to me when she does talk about how she feels. He often has to leave the room, because she isn’t respectful. His stand on things is that she needs to leave and the sooner the better. I agree she needs to move out, but I don’t agree that he should not be speaking to her. They don’t even acknowledge each other in the same room. Her graduation is coming up and he doesn’t want to go. I feel in the middle all the time... Any suggestions? Is it right for him not to talk to her?

P.

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I would suggest staying out of it all together. Here’s why:

The more responsibility you take for the relationship between father and daughter – the less responsibility they will take. This is their problem to work out on their own terms. It’s not your problem unless you choose to make it so.

Mark

www.MyOutOfControlTeen.com

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The Strong-Willed Out-of-Control Teen

The standard disciplinary techniques that are recommended for “typical” teenagers do not take into account the many issues facing teens with serious behavioral problems. Disrespect, anger, violent rages, self-injury, running away from home, school failure, hanging-out with the wrong crowd, drug abuse, theft, and legal problems are just some of the behaviors that parents of defiant teens will have to learn to control.

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