She came home late after work, said I know you're going to be mad, but I got one. I blew up. I got mad and told her that she needed to go spend the night at her older brother's house, while I cooled down. I was furious for her defying me. She stayed one night there, and moved over to her girlfriends. Haven’t heard from her in a week. She's going to school. I talked to the coach. What do I do? Do I go and force her home, do I call the cops (she's 18, I don’t think they can do anything) leave it alone, she’ll come home on her own? She won’t even talk to me. Help
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Hi B.,
You’re right …the cops will not be able to force her to return home.
I think it is good that she is “out on her own.” This experience will teach her how to survive away from “the nest.” Plus she will develop a greater appreciation for YOU as she lives day-to-day without the comforts of “home” and “mom.”
If (or should I say ‘when’) she returns home, this will be a good time for the two of you to sit down so you can lay-out the ground rules for her living ‘under your roof.’ If she does not want to follow your house rules, then she can live elsewhere. It’s her choice.
You’re obligations have been met. Now that your daughter is an adult, living in YOUR house is a privilege – not a right.
Mark