Thanks for the email. My son made somewhat of an about-face-turn a couple of months ago. Things aren't always perfect everyday, but he seems to have really grown. My being patient & truly listening seemed to make him respect me more. He has made a lot of promises that I intend to help him keep. He promises to do much better in school his last two years. He has some making up to do. But I have no doubt he will pull through.
I allowed the purchase of another vehicle, a 1996 Mustang, as he thought he had a job, through a friend of his, but the job didn't happen. He knows I can't afford another vehicle 100% & his dad doesn't help a whole lot, so I try to keep him positive in continuing in his job search. His part in it will be to repay me half, $2000. I work about 45 minutes from home, so another vehicle really was needed when he does find one. And too, I figured it would give him something to appreciate since he seems to be making wiser choices.
The other night the two of us watched the movie "Life As A House". It is rated R, but at almost 17, I thought he would be able to relate to it quite well. I think it really made him think a bit. I think this movie has a great message.
I think the most difficult thing for me, as somewhat of a co-dependant person, I worked at this for years, was to let him take those risks & chances that he wanted & needed to take on his own. In turn, as he has shown more respect & maturity, he gains more independence.
Thank you for your help & support. Thank you for your continued e-mails. There were days that it did & still does keep me motivated. Thank you for caring about all of our children. They are our Nation’s future.
And with that said, I hope my 13 year old son doesn't give me as much grief. But if he does, maybe I will be all the wiser.
The Strong-Willed Out-of-Control Teen
The standard disciplinary techniques that are recommended for “typical” teenagers do not take into account the many issues facing teens with serious behavioral problems. Disrespect, anger, violent rages, self-injury, running away from home, school failure, hanging-out with the wrong crowd, drug abuse, theft, and legal problems are just some of the behaviors that parents of defiant teens will have to learn to control.
Click here for the full article...
Click here for the full article...
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