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By the time they are adolescents, your kids should have a pretty good idea of what to expect in terms of parental goals and behavior limits. But even the well-trained youngster may be tempted to push boundaries or be led astray by friends to do something he shouldn't. When that happens, a mother or father cannot afford to sit back and pretend that nothing has happened, hoping that it never occur again. Instead, you must be vigilant and take action to reinforce all that you have taught your children already from the time they were toddlers. Don't give in to their wheedling or your own time constraints. Take the necessary time now to train your adolescents properly, and that will mean issuing appropriate discipline. The art of adolescent discipline falls into three categories: The first is training or guidance. We discipline our children when we set household rules, place limits on their behavior (such as curfews), and monitor their social activities with friends...

R esearch reveals that teenagers who text 120 times a day or more (which many teens do nowadays) are more likely to have had sex or used alcohol and drugs than teens who don't send as many messages. The study is not suggesting that "hyper-texting" leads to sex, drinking or drugs, but it's shocking to see an apparent link between excessive messaging and this kind of risk-taking behavior. The study asserts that a significant number of teenagers are very susceptible to peer-pressure – and also have permissive or absent parents. The study was conducted at 20 public high schools in the Cleveland area, and is based on confidential paper surveys of more than 4,200 high school students. It found that about 1 in 5 students were hyper-texters (i.e, those who text more than 120 times a day) and about 1 in 9 are hyper-networkers (i.e., those who spend 3 or more hours a day on Facebook and other social networking websites). About 1 in 25 are both hyper-texters and hype...

Gulping cough syrup for an instant "buzz" certainly is not a new thing for adolescents that have raided the medicine cabinet for a quick, cheap, and legal high. But unfortunately, this dangerous and potentially deadly practice is on the rise. So it's important for moms and dads to understand the risks and know how to prevent their children from intentionally overdosing on cough and cold medicine. Before the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) replaced the narcotic codeine with DXM as an over-the-counter (OTC) cough suppressant in the 1970s, adolescents were simply guzzling down cough syrup for a quick buzz. Over the years, adolescents discovered that they still could get high by taking large doses of any OTC medicine containing DEXTROMETHORPHAN (also called DXM). DXM-containing products — tablets, capsules, gel caps, lozenges, and syrups — are labeled DM, cough suppressant, or Tuss (or contain "tuss" in the title). Medicines containin...

"How can I make sure my children understand the seriousness of certain situations (e.g., using drugs, talking to strangers on the internet, etc.) without yelling and coming on so strong and aggressive that I damage their self-esteem." When your youngster's safety is at risk — whether he's run into the street, reached for an open flame, or gotten dangerously close to a pool — yelling, screaming, or crying out is a perfectly normal – and appropriate – response. At that moment, you would do anything possible to get your youngster's attention and get him out of harm's way. After a parent’s “screaming-yelling” episode, it's natural for children to get upset — and for you to want to apologize. But the truth is this: your children are getting upset in response to the fear and urgency in your voice, not because you've been "too strict." At times like these, you should comfort them, but without apologizing. Give your youngster a hug and sa...

Disruptive Behavior Disorder is an expression used to describe a set of externalizing negativistic behaviors that co-occur during childhood and which are referred to collectively in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders: Fourth Edition (DSM-IV) as: "Attention-Deficit and Disruptive Behavior Disorders". There are three subgroups of externalizing behaviors: • Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) • Conduct Disorder (CD) • Oppositional Defiant disorder (ODD) Treatment for Oppositional Defiant disorder and CD at the clinic is based on the premise that these behaviors are the result of a combination of a metabolic dysfunction and environmental factors. We approach treatment in a similar way to our treatment of kids and teens with ATTENTION DEFICIT HYPERACTIVITY DISORDER. There is however an added emphasis on Counseling and Behavior Modification techniques. Please read our treatment model for ATTENTION DEFICIT HYPERACTIVITY DISORDER. O...

Teenagers are getting high on an emerging drug called ‘SPICE” – a concoction also known as "K2" and fake weed that is causing hallucinations, vomiting, agitation and other dangerous effects. SPICE is a synthetic form of marijuana. Some people compare the effects of SPICE to a marijuana high. It is sold in head shops as incense, although teens and some adults do -- more often than not -- smoke it. It can be smoked in a pipe or rolled like a cigarette. SPICE is incense composed of natural herbs such as canavalia rosea, clematis nuciferia, heima salicfolia, and ledum palustre. Various sources report that SPICE also contains the synthetic cannabanoid JWH-018, which when smoked can produce intoxicative effects similar to marijuana. As a synthetic, it does not register on current drug detection tests. The SPICE website expressly states that it is "not intended for human consumption" and is intended only to be used as incense. Clearly though, the hundreds of cases ...

"Hi Mark, I have been following the course now for 4 weeks. There have been many improvements, but the hardest part for me (single mom) is remaining calm and keeping a Poker face and I am continually mentally beating myself up as a failure. Are there any other pointers which will assist me in keeping calm and a poker face?" Every parent has been there at least once (and usually dozens of times). Your youngster does something that flips a switch inside you, and in a single moment you transform from a reasonable mom to a raging b____. Learning how to control anger is a skill that can save you from reacting inappropriately with your kids. In addition, watching a mother or father deal effectively with angry feelings teaches children ways to cope with their own emotions. Here are 25 tips that will help parents manage their anger: 1. "I," not "you"— Avoid attacking your youngster with "you" statements—"You are such a slob!" or ...

If you are feeling fed-up with your teen’s behavior, you’re not the only one. Surprisingly, your troubled teen may be feeling just as fed-up with her behavior. A hostile teenager’s violent acts do not empower her, but leaves her feeling like she has little or no control over herself. The period of adolescence hurtles a number of mental and physical changes at your teenager. If she has a strong foundation, which comes from your set rules and structure at home, then you can expect that she will be able to deal with these changes more easily and possibly never have to enter into a stage of hostility. If you do not provide a set structure for her to latch on to, then it is like she is plunging through fast-paced adolescence without a seat belt. You may have noticed that as your youngster has grown from a toddler in her terrible twos to a teenager equipped with mood swings, applicable discipline has been more difficult to enforce. By the time they reach the early teens, the...

I have a question about my 17 year old. With all the issues we have been having with her over this past 1.5 years, I definitely have a hard time trusting her anymore. Things seemed like they were starting to come around and I was letting go a bit of the feelings of mistrust. Then, yesterday I cleaned my daughter's room as she was at work and we are trying to sell our house and had a showing. We only get 2-3 hours notice so there are many times I have to clean her room so it's ready for showing. She knows this and also knows that if she doesn't do it herself, it has to get done so I will be in there cleaning. Everything was fine until she got home and went into her room and come out hollering at me and asking me what I did with her Sleep Eze pills. I know she has been purchasing them once in awhile as she has been having problems sleeping. I never touched them nor saw them. She started acting almost panicky and started looking through my things thinking I had h...

Dear Mr. Hutten, I am beginning session 3 of your program tomorrow. I am however very bothered by my 15 year old coming home and telling me that she is bi. I have always raised her Christian and she knows that I don't approve of this kind of behavior. She announced to me also that she is now atheist. She is also involved in the goth look. I was reading your sample contract and it states that I will accept her individuality. Please tell me that this is a behavior issue and not an individuality issue. Remember she wants me to accept her "girlfriend" coming over to visit and to allow her to meet up with her. I told her that I accept her as bi, but I will certainly pray for her. This and the atheist and goth behavior makes me crawl inside. Please, is this a behavior issue where I can say no and set consequences for, or do I still have to just accept it? Remember she’s only 15. Very Saddened Mom, V. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hi V., First and forem...

"My son has Oppositional Defiant Disorder and ADHD. Should I give his teacher (tutor) some strategies to deal with him in the classroom during summer school (starts on Mon.)? If so, what can I tell her?" Click here for the answer... ==> My Out-of-Control Child: Help for Parents with ODD Children

Defiant kids are often upset, frustrated, looking to externalize blame and operating under the assumption that they are equal in authority and wisdom to grown-ups. This results in being upset in their interaction with their peers and with anybody in authority like the poor long suffering mother/father. When grown-ups resort to spanking, oppositional kids are often able to manipulate the situation and turn the focus on the moms and dads' behavior. Oppositional kids are commonly also labeled as explosive as strong-willed. Most moms and dads of oppositional kids are afraid to set definite and definitive limits, and chaos results. Underlying influences driving oppositional behavior may be feelings of inadequacy due to concerns such as: peer rejection, conflict with moms and dads, past traumas, body image concerns and sibling conflicts. The perception is that oppositional behavior is cool. All kids display oppositional behavior from time to time, but it's possible that your...